New Diet

So fun story!

Not only am I sensitive to gluten (it makes my joints hurt), but I am also lactose intolerant. So no more ICE CREAM. No more CREAM BASED ICINGS. Pizza I can have, ricotta I can have, and I'm pretty sure yogurt won't hurt me, but I'd rather not chance it to be honest.

And because it is SO HARD for me to find any good recipes or snacks this blog is going to have a lot of food stuffs going on!! I hope you're as excited as I am. :) !!

Lets start with snacks! Oh and Red Lobster.
I had lunch with a friend yesterday at Red Lobster, ordered the shrimp jambalaya, was very disappointed. It was way to oily, had a dairy based sauce which wasn't listed in the details(yes I should have asked,but I've never heard of a jambalaya like that). So I do not recommend it.

I forgot to grab some snacks and a lunch from my house before work, so I stopped by a very awesome gas station with a sweet grocery market. I grabbed some yummy foods: a few larabar's, almond yogurt, and almond thins.

This one not so great. It's the cookie dough flavor. It has a little bit of milk because of the chocolate chips.

this one is delicious. Chocolate is not quite the best for dairy free but for gluten free its amazing.

 This was my lunch yesterday. Oh my gosh. The banana bread flavor is yummy. The almond yogurt is delicious. The consistency is a little different but not far from dairy yogurt.

Well I've got to head over to spin class and then the grocery store! Hopefully I can at least talk mom into coming out with me. :)

A great grandfather

Here lies a man, old and tested by time. He lays in a hospice bed, he's sea foam gown draped over him ad his blanket just over his feet. The wife he's known for 59years, so short and frail leans over him. They just remarried, and how content she is.
The look on his face tells me he is ready to sleep, not our sleep but the sleep that takes him home. Back to when he was a boy, when he first met Jesus, when he first met his wife, when his mother would make him warm milk to sleep.
His wife speaks of him coming home, my mother his daughter in law, tries to hold her tears back. She knows he won't be home.

This man once a mountain and now so frail was born on 1931. Not many of his fellow are still here.

How I know they all wish his blood granddaughter and her adorable little boy were here. Instead here I sit on this little couch pleasantly surprised at how beautifully decorated this hospice home is.

Interesting things..

I feel like my blog has been very lack luster lately. Sure I promised to be honest, but have I?

Or have I been holding back so that I don't hurt others?

I have a good friend who I tell, well two good friends, that I tell pretty much everything too. EVERYTHING.

One of them always informs me that I NEVER have a dull moment. And he's right. So I just have to put all that on here, because y'all dont want to read something lack luster, where the heck is he fun in that??

So here we go:
I'll just start with today! Make it kind of easier!

I actually woke up on time(ish) today! My alarm was set for six and I woke up to some opera, wasn't sure what was going on for a second. I didn't manage to get fully awake and out of bed til 730, with Oliver's help of course.

I've been doing cooking in the mornings, mostly for one day but I try to make enough for several. I've been eating more fish and being over all healthier. It's nice. :)

When grocery hopping I have a habit of buying food to fill four people up. So I've been trying to cook some of that. As well as clean which I will do more of tonight. I was switched to a new location for work(I'm at a gym now), and a new time schedule. I'll be closer for now. Which isn't too bad. :)

Just realized that I will be the only one closing... Conceal and carry license here I come!!! Pepper spray will be tagging along.

I also will be asking a member to wait with me while I close...

I was getting a few refer a friends(enter friends so they can also be placed in a drawing) and the guy that was filling the sheets out was hitting on me pretty intensely. It was almost cute! And creepy at the same time. Don't get me wrong he's a good guy! Lol

Right now I'm at the gym in the sauna so I'm going to say good night!!! Hopefully I'll have some more fun things to say soon!!

Yum.

Gluten free brownies..with raspberries...Mmm..

SAA came over for dinner last night. It was delicious. Also had a chicken fruit spring salad mix. Nummy. As well as Stella Rossa: yummy wine but low alcohol content.

It was good to see Oliver all happy and hyper while SAA was here. I'll have to allow more visitations.

Movie Night

Sooo

Went camping that was honestly just interesting. Kinda fun but not really.

We get back to town and a movie night was decided. Well I went to pick up Oliver at my moms, ended up falling a sleep on her ottoman, had lunch with with my parents and step grandparents. I watched a few westerns with my grampa. Almost fell asleep. :) had yummy burgers.
Went home took a shower and went to watch tv and start crocheting. I haven't crocheted in a loooong time. It's nice. Helps me control my anger and anxiety.
Well SAA text me to tell me that his roommate would be watching his daughter at another house and took me up on my offer to bring Oliver over so they could spend time together.

And the main bitch of this whole post is the fact that SAA has spent more time on his phone than paying attention to Oliver.

And now that I got that out.. I can talk about..
Hunting season. Sooo excited!!

Okay going back to crocheting. :)

705AM

So I just woke up at my ex's. On the futon in his rec room. I remember saying I didn't want to get sick in my fiends car. But can not for the life of me remember who I said/thought would take me home.

Make it better I got sick. Totally awesome right?? Two beers and two hits of vodka kicked my ass way way work than I thought. I would like to say I wont drink so much again.... But well I honestly probably won't.

Knocked on SAAs door last night and was greeted by another girl bit was great. :/

Getting a hang over and trying to find a ride... Type later...



Update::

Found a ride. Was told I puked on a rug by the toilet. I thought I made it in the toilet. Walked to a main rode for my ride to pick me up. And just realized I also managed to get some nasty puke on my dress. Nice white dress.

I think I'm done drinking drinking for a while. I'll down a bottle if wine. But that's about it. Oh and it just started raining.

Did I mention another girl answered the door when I knocked? Anyways. No more alcohol.


For the most part.


And girls night besides the ending was a blast!!!

Free Maps

It's actually very quite here at the revenue office. It's nice and annoying at the same time. There aren't many people here, I'm number 94 and they are only on number 70.
My arm/ab work/shoulder work out is going to have to wait until after Zumba.

I had dinner with a one of my closest friends last night. It was fun, needed and full of laughter. He's going through a divorce and we've been close friends for about eight or nine months.

I saw my momma this morning. Cried a little. It was nice to have a binding moment with her. Those are few and far between. Im glad we have them it helps our relationship.

But back to the free maps.
They are sitting there on the counter and I can't express how bad I want one. I'm going to very giddily take one as I step up there and try not to act too happy about it as that may seem odd in a place like this.

When I get home tonight in going to lay it out on the dining table, close my eyes an drop a marker.

Better yet I'm going to tape it to the wall and throw something, I'm just not sure what. I'll figure that out later. But I'm going to go on a road trip. And I am so excited. I'm not sure exactly when ill go or who will go with me. But that can be determined later. :)

.myself.

I am impulsive. I can be irrational. I over analyze. I am almost annoyingly loyal and to feel betrayed is the worst feeling to me, its something I just can't get over right away. I try to think before I speak, but being impulsive that doesn't always work.
I am cautious when I first enter a relationship, but once I know I can trust you I shower you with affection and if I can gifts.
I prefer the little things in life. I don't care about having bigger or better.
I love to recycle and love the taste of organic natural local. I fight depression more often than not and hate being alone.
Country is one of the best kinds. Of anything.
Skinning a deer is a great bonding moment. So is cuddling.
I like pbr and wine. Or a miller 64. If I'm on the west coast I love IPA.
I detest the cold, unless I have a hot cup of tea.
I love the summer months but do my best writing on the colder months. It's not the dark I'm afraid of but what I can't see.
If you really know me I am an open book and can be an easy read. If not I'm tough to crack.
I believe in The father the son and the holy ghost. As well as astrology.
Cardio is one if the best work outs in my book. I fall asleep listening to violins or classical and try to pet my dog before he jumps off the bed.

Of course I could go on and on. It's not that I need to find my self, as one of my best friends suggested. No I need to become more into with my self. I was lost and am found. So instead of worrying about having a date to a football game or party. I'll go alone. For the next few months I'll just be me and enjoy every moment. I'll live by the tattoo I'm getting in a few weeks:
Live.love.forgive.

Be prepared to hear about yoga and me getting "in tune" with me.

Ah Sunday

I went to bed around... Probably 1215 and was out. I woke up about four times this morning and couldn't get enough sleep. It was nice. Ish.

I am past my anger stage and at the forgiveness staged. I will say I am still a little sad because I was just getting used to the whole relationship thing and really liking it.

I'm planning on walking Oliver, maybe a small run with him, hitting my apartment gym and having a great day at work. Not sure what will happen tonight but I am sure it will be nice. Actually I think I am going to stay home and actually clean.


Just walked out side: it's raining. That's why I couldn't get enough sleep.

Single. Again.

I don't really know how I feel. I've pin pointed why I "over reacted", but I really can't get over what's gone on and a few things I've realized. I know I promised to always be honest on here and I have but I'm going to have to omit part of my reasoning. How I feel about a certain person. And the entire lack of trust.

SAA and I were great when we were good. But I just... A few things came up and looking back I feel like a few lines were crossed.

I want to give it another shot. But at the same time I know not a lot will change. So it makes me not want too.

Eh. We'll see. Like I've mentioned before I am not good at relationships.