Just a quick {update}

Things are good.
I feel good.

Really though, this morning has felt... like... like I can breathe! Of course the simple fact of it being a Wednesday and not Tuesday or Thursday helps quite a bit.
I can breathe.

Read that again, just one more time; okay make it two.
The second time read those three words slowly, and as if you yourself feel like you can finally breathe once everyone in the dog-pile gets off of you and you finally have your breath after running as hard and as fast as you could for five minutes.

Do you understand now?

The feeling is so relieving, and exciting.
and terrifying. 

'What? Girl, why you sayin' it's terrifying??' (that's you asking me)
Because that means that at any moment the creeping fog will come in full force. Maybe slowly, maybe fast, maybe lightly or maybe so thick you can't see through it. That is why I try not to think about those moments where everything feels great, I can breathe and the mornings are smooth.

I have, however, been attempting to pay more attention to what I'm feeling these past few days so that I can provide a decent analysis for those of you reading. Over the past few days I've been feeling better, lighter if you will.

  (The weather is beautiful today, which also helped to keep my mood up. It's tremendously important to get out for even a few moments; especially when the sun is shining and the wind is beautiful.)

I've been taking vitamins regularly, incorporating supposed depression-fighting foods into my diet, as well as making it a point to ride my bicycle again. This morning there was even enough time to wake up to do a quick routine of morning yoga. (which I'll be doing again this evening as I've noticed my hips are getting a little tight.)

(We all know one of my strong points is confidence and over exaggerated vanity. Which is a bi-product of hiding my depression for so long...  Yet with that being said, it's important to find beauty in yourself. It's important to be silly and goofy.)

Unfortunately as hard as I try to keep some sort of routine going in my life it doesn't seem to fully stick. It's there, it's just not... exceedingly consistent. I'm currently seeing a handsome young man whom I find a little bit of comfort in his routine; it's actually a huge help for me. It's comforting and relaxing to know that I can rely on the knowledge of when I will hear from him. Yes it sounds silly, but it's true. I'm making a large conscious effort to build and maintain a set-ish schedule and routine. Apparently routines are a big help in our battle.
Thus far I know that keeping 2-3calenders is a big help for me staying on track. In each of them (well I try to keep them all synced) my attempts are to have most of my day scheduled, of course with room for movement.
For example I have:

• Morning yoga
• Shower
• Wake-up/Start getting LittleMiss ready
• Leave
• Study Time
• Class.....

and so forth... Keep in mind each day is different, this is a simple rubric I attempt to keep.

This all leads to....

Rule Four:
Establish some sort of a routine for yourself. Read my above routine again if that gives you so help. Keep it simple and short to start with. Maybe wake up every morning at a set time, follow it with morning reading/yoga/coffee/tea/walk what have you. Maybe take lunch at a within a set time frame everyday (such as between 1130 and 130, giving you wiggle room should something come up to hinder your leaving time). Maybe, just maybe your routine needs to be reading or journaling for thirty minutes everyday. 
Don't worry if at first it doesn't stick. This is all trial and error, do not, do not  stress about setting up and find your routine. Starting small is always easiest, always best. By starting small we are able to find what really works for us, what truly fits the best. 

;

Do you hear that?

It's raining, and it sounds beautiful.

Well aside from the Lord of the Rings The Return of the King that is currently playing in the background.

But it is still raining and it sounds beautiful. LittleMiss is sleeping. Ludwig is curled up next to me. And I'm about to crawl into bed. This is my last day of being a lazy mom, a depressed mom, and a messy home...renter. I've been very reflective and inflective as of late. Quite a few Exciting things have taken place, a few I can't share and a few I can.

Vegan Deliciousness!!

There is a fantastic food truck (now also has a bakery) called Kind Kitchen. I loved them the first time I had their Indian Taco. Fantastic. They support local farmers, make vegan AND gluten free items.

The coffee shop I work for recently incorporated them into our pastry selection, a brilliant idea. 

I had to do some prep work and walked in to these beauties:

Vegan- Gluten Free Red Velvet Cupcakes. 

I shouldn't have to say more, but I will go on...

 

I want this for all major events in my life.
Valentines Day.
Birthdays.
Anniversaries.
Just because.
"Oh we got into a fight, here's a 'sorry I made you mad cupcake'"

...LittleMiss's birthday too...

It's not at all dry, like you might expect of a gluten free pastry. And the 'cream-cheese' frosting isn't like the traditional cream-cheese frosting (that I honestly am not much of a fan of...). Which completely makes sense because it's vegan 'cream-cheese' frosting. I honestly haven't had many tries of regular Red Velvet cakes, but this one is just...fantastic.

If you are ever in Arkansas you have to try them.



{{ Follow me on Instagram: @mamasquirrelchatters
Follow Kind Kitchen too!: @KindKitchen }}

Gettin Serious about Health

Since I'm looking at working full time and returning to school, I have to get very seriously into the habit of cleaning right after doing whatever and eating healthy. I don't want to turn into a balloon. :(

Not just for my health reasons are those things important to me (food, not cleaning I'm not that messy :/ ), but also for LittleMiss. I may have mentioned this in prior post, but when I brace very stressed my breast milk supply dropped tremendously. Then I was blessed with a job that allowed me to have LittleMiss with me. My stocked supply has become nonexistent, very stressful. But I'm working on controlling that stress so it doesn't affect my building up a supply. 

That is just over an ounce. Pumped from only one side, while LittleMiss was nursing the other side. slightly disheartening. When my supply first came in it was ridiculously excessive. 

Before giving birth to LittleMiss I did tons of research on breast milk so that I wouldn't have to be so in the dark later on, and I'm glad I did. Yesterday I asked a few moms for their tips and tricks so I would hear real stories from local ladies. It's common sense that I need to eat, but because I battle anorexia, it's also something that I easily forget. 

Nursing mothers need 500more calories in their diet. 

Healthy calories tend to be best. 

Nursing mothers need to drink water like it's going out of style. 

When you are dehydrated, your baby is dehydrated. 

Coconut oil can help fatten your Breastmilk up. 

So while at work this morning I had one of our 'everything' bagels (has poppy seeds and other seeds on top) with a bit of coconut oil instead of butter and just a few dashes of cinnamon. It was tasty :)

Upon returning home I made a cup of nursing tea, with a tablespoon of Brewers Yeast. Then I made this deliciousness. 

Grapefruit and oatmeal :)

Oatmeal helps nursing mother produce milk. 

((So get ready for a whole lotta oatmeal recipes.))

I cut the grapefruit in half, broiling one side with just a bit of brown sugar on top. 

The other half I went ahead and put the raw meat in to my oatmeal with about a fourth of a teaspoon of agave syrup. 

 

Because I need the calories I used 2% milk. Coconut milk is my favorite, or goats milk, or raw cows milk. You can use what ever you want. :)

I would have rather had stevia or raw sugar but oh well!

Once the broiled side of the grapefruit was finished being cooked I scraped the warm meat into the bowl as well. 

It was tasty!! But then again I love grapefruit anyways :)

Even LittleMiss was eyeing my breakfast. 

Do you have any favorite oatmeal recipes?

Come Little Children, Let Me introduce you to Aldis

Hopefully you have an Aldis in your area, or maybe you can find the fantastic equivalent of one. 

Sadly I have been relatively unable to buy groceries for a little while. Little time and even littler money. Now that I am receiving child support I was able to go to the grocer, and starting tomorrow I'll be working out again. Id like to think that most if the New Years resolution folks will be gone. Here's to hoping I'm right ;)

Anyways, I had been hearing rumors that Aldis had started carrying a few organic items, so I was truly hoping that they would still have a few when I went today. While there wasn't a lot, there was quite a lot more than I expected!! Not only are they carrying organic fruits and veggies, they also have organic snacks and sauces. 

(I didn't think to take any pictures at the store, I was attempting to keep LittleMiss entertained.)

Avocados.                   Asparagus

Green beans.              Edemame

Grapefruit (.29¢).        Hummus

Lime.                            Broccoli

Celery                          Mango

Baby Potobellos.        Sweet peppers

Lettuse.                       Lunch turkey

Zucchini.                         Carrots

Squash.              Organic baby carrots

Organic honey.            Radishes 

Organic agave.          Green peppers

Kamalative olives.       Roma Tomatoes

Kiwi.                            Strawberries 

Red pepper humus

Organic bananas (.69¢ I think)

(Huge) red potatoes (.99¢)

Navel Oranges

Gala apples ($2.99)

Pears

Organic spinach ($2.49)

For all if that I paid just over $80, tax included. So many beautiful colors, so fresh and crunchy and tasty. To be honest almost all of this will become food for LittleMiss, a good portion will be blended to be her solids and the rest of it I will eat and turn into milk ;)

Aldis doesn't price match or accept coupons; yes sometimes you can find almost the same product at another store for a bit cheaper but that's rare. 

(Oh, please pay no mind to the mess in the back of the pictures)

I didn't see any gluten free products, aside from the hummus and veggies, but maybe if there is a big enough request they will start carrying that as well. 

Any good deals that you've found and loved?

Smoothie or Perfectly Melted Icecream?

Breakfast began calling my name this morning. My cabinets are a bit under stocked, a grocery trip is being planned. I need to make my two to four week menu plan and write out the grocery list that is going to be needed.

Anyways! Sorry I ramble so much, one of my pregnancy side effects.

I decided on a shake. My blender had a perfectly different thought.